Chickens in a box

This week is every working parent's worst nightmare. For starters, I'm in Barcelona for three days, and at the same time, Eddie has jury service for two weeks (which seems to mainly involve getting the train and sitting around drinking disgusting coffee before being sent home again). William is cycling to school. But. Has an inset on Wednesday (Wednesday? Seriously?). Something we had not foreseen and totally forgot about until he mentioned it in passing on Sunday. After a minor moment of total panic, we pulled ourselves together and managed to book him in with a mate for the day, until such time as Eddie can pick him up. In the meantime, James' school run is being managed by my friend Kay down the road, whose boys fortunately also go to Thorngrove so it's quite easy for them to all go together. But. Eddie texted me this morning to say that James had woken up with a temperature and may have caught the bug that's currently doing the rounds at school. I really h...

Long, long week. Too tired to type. Time for a martini. 🍸 Working from the classroom while James was at athletics training next door. 

We bought an X-Box for William and James just before William started at secondary school, because we didn't want them to be the odd ones out. I can honestly say that since that day it has been a source of concern, negativity, aggression and conflict. On all sides. Over time we've had to... Lock the room the X-Box is kept in  Lock the controllers in the gun safe Stage temporary X-Box bans Demand back the money that's been spent unwittingly on downloading games at the touch of the wrong button And diffused endless fights over... What game to play When to play How long to play for To play separately or together And the ultimate - when to switch the (damn) thing off.  On Friday the red mist descended on me and this time, was not to be denied by temporary measures. After yet another hour of bickering over which creatures to spawn in Ark, the end came when James lost his temper and switched off the machine, only to be chased up the stairs and punched by William. ...

The meeting ended, my taxi was waiting outside and home was within reach. Or so I thought... Sadly I hadn't factored in the horrendous Paris traffic, which literally crawled at a snails pace through the city. "What time did you say your train was?" Asked the driver, laissez-faire. Surely we weren't going to miss the 6.13pm to St Pancras after all that. Fortunately not, we got there with time to spare and I was soon ensconced in Costa with Les Miserables (which I've downloaded onto my new Kindle and am really enjoying. Never did get round to watching the film). An announcement that the electronic passport control machines weren't working didn't phase me, I was through and on my way. Or so I thought... Alas the passengers now trying to get through passport control electronically couldn't, and had to be processed by actual human beings. This departure from the machines meant that the train was delayed by 25 minutes, presumably while the unfortunate ...

Last week Eddie was in Dallas (to name but a few of his stop offs) and this week it's my turn, only fortunately closer to home in Paris. Even better - trainable rather than having to faff with a flight. As ever, a lot of information to process, in a small, stuffy room with a packed agenda and a lot of slides. But as always the people never fail to be absolutely lovely and I feel extremely lucky to be part of such a fantastic team. Heading out into the fresh air and walking to our incredible restaurant Minipalais , was equally amazing. It's always great to spend time with people you were (slightly) intimidated by 12 hours earlier and now find are just genuinely nice, funny, human beings.  Having said that, it's now 11.30pm, my bag is packed and all I can think about is going home. I wonder if I'll ever get used to being away?

Eddie's in the US this week, on what seems to be a never-ending round of internal flights, customer meetings and horrible hotels. With the US Government on hold while they fight about paying for the the Wall, chaos reigns at the airports, adding to his misery. In the meantime I'm holding the fort at home. I've told William to get on his bike, literally, because I don't have time to drop off or pick up. James still needs taking in, but my new year's resolution on the school front, is never to drive over the Bottleneck Bridge, where Mums in 4x4s seem incapable of understanding the concept of giving way. This results in a regular pile-up on both sides of the tiny bridge as no-one can get past and no-one's prepared to back-up (or perhaps can't, reverse can be challenging in a [insert 4 x 4 of choice]. I digress. James gets dropped off as quickly as possible, giving me time to do a U-ie (sp) and head for the M4, where I promptly get stuck in the traffic fro...

William's 13th birthday passed without incident yesterday and was actually, as he himself put it, 'the best birthday I've ever had where it's been a school day." We're still coming to terms with being the parents of a teenager . Will is great. Of course he has the odd strop (don't we all?) but on the whole he's pretty awesome. Very much his own man. Will is also very like me in a lot of ways, particularly when it comes to the forgetful, ditzy side that he has. Reminds me of me in the; 'my dog ate my homework'* stage I went through at about his age. I've warned him already that this may be a stage that never goes away...it hasn't for me anyway. As for Number Two. He claims to be 'exhausted' at all times, having been awake apparently for hours on end every night. I don't believe him. Today we were supposed to be going to cricket nets, which I knew he didn't want to try. To add insult to injury, I had to go a call 4pm - ...

Day Six and we haven't touched a drop. Doesn't sound like a long time, but if I think about it - it is. What with the wedding back in December and then the run-up to, and aftermath of, Christmas and New Year, we have pretty much been drinking almost every night. It's so easy to let alcohol creep up on you and become a habit. The scary thing is that you don't notice, and it creeps up some more. Soon, as well as drinking often, you drink more. And more. And more. And more often. And so on... I know where that leads. Time to take a break.

Despite having been due on Christmas Day, William decided to turn up two weeks late on 8th January ( see early blogging efforts ). The same day as Elvis, no less! He has been described fondly as "a lemon on a pair of cocktail sticks" by his Godfather over the years, but size aside, when it comes to the other attributes associated with the (almost) teenage boy, William ticks many of the boxes, a short list of which includes: Inability to get up in the morning  Non-existent personal grooming regime  Addiction to the X Box Addition to sundry screens including iphone, iPad, Macbook, Surface, Kindle (whatever's switched on) Addiction to YouTube Severe grumpiness Frustration at the Unfairness Of The World Despair and/or/including embarrassment at the idiocy/uselessness of his parents A growing arsenal of disparaging one-liners Inability to sit still Obsession with Game of Thrones, and the age at which he'll be able to watch it Frequent rejection of smaller br...

Day two of 2019 and I'm concerned that that eggy bread with maple syrup for breakfast, didn't conform to my new low-carb, low-fat, low-sugar diet. On the plus side, it is alcohol-free, so at least that's something. 24 hours into my new regime of heath and vitality it's safe to say I feel as far from healthy and vital as it's possible to feel. Onwards and upwards. I'm turning the heating on for starters.