Chickens in a box

At last! I've finally had a go. It's been on my hit list of things to do before I die along with riding a beautiful horse along a beach and drinking a very dry martini in New York. One down, two to go! Such a good laugh, Sonya and Lucy very kindly let me join their lesson and after 10 minutes feeling a bit of a wally on 'Woody' trying to work out how on earth to swing the polo stick it was on to Larry and trying the same on a real horse. It's a bit like hockey on horseback - great fun and utterly different from 'normal' riding, all the rules go out of the window which suited me down to the ground (I've always been rubbish at being disciplined at dressage/schooling) and although hitting the ball was almost impossible, I did have great fun bombing up and down the arena missing it. Poor Larry, he must have despaired, but at least I didn't hit him on the head. Can see myself getting seriously addicted to polo - watch this space! In the meantime I'm h...

Another Christmas, another baby. Happy times with James' christening swiftly followed by Christmas Day itself. A houseful of people, rubbish on the box, too much to eat and drink and a mountain of presents. Perfect.

Check out Will in his snowman outfit for the Little Sods carol concert! In the midst of all the festivities, the grown-ups have realised we're out for the next 3 nights on the trot, a first since William was born. I am going to be on my last legs by Christmas Day....

Interesting moves afoot on the War on Warts. The Warts thought they were ahead of the game, infesting both Will's hands and taking hold. Then to add to his woes he managed to contract Melloscum on his knees and upper thighs where his eczema is worst. Between the melloscum and the warts, Will has recently been just a sea of lumps. Honestly, just when you think things can't possibly get any worse! HOWEVER, it looks as though Will's immune system is finally retaliating and the Warts are retreating en masse. The fleshy lumps are shrivelling into submission and Eddie and I are desperately hoping that the battle will be lost and William will triumph. On the melloscum front, furious scratching is also proving to be a useful combat strategy as it helps the immune system recognise that the lumps have no right to be there and should be destroyed immediately. Go Will - Seek and DESTROY.

After gritting our teeth over the past two days, we finally got to the stage where we felt James should go back to hospital last night when he took just 1 oz at 5pm, threw up 2 more at 7pm and proceeded to scream horribly for the rest of the evening. It was like he was starving but unable to feed and finally he ran out of steam and went terrifyingly quiet, still and pale. We called Basingstoke who agreed he should be looked at but not by them as they had no room. G.R.E.A.T. So over to A&E in good old Reading we went at 00.30 this morning. It was horrible actually because I haven't been back to A&E since Mummy was taken ill and to make matters worse they put James in the same booth. I snatched him up and asked to move and they were very understanding and let us go somewhere else. After 3 hours of being poked and prodded by a variety of students, SHOs, Registrars etc, we were finally admitted to the ward at 4.30am and they were about to put a tube into James to get him to fee...

James has got his scream back! I NEVER thought I'd be relieved to say that :) He's still drinking almost nothing, I'm lucky if I can get 1 - 2 ozs down him at a time, but it's better than nothing and he's definitely getting better slowly so I'm taking each day as it comes. Otherwise feeling utterly exhausted what with all the preparations for Christmas, trying to keep Will amused and looking after poor little James. I always think Christmas is going to be a wonderful time where I'll sit back, sip my champagne and relax. Yeah right.

Back on the beat, this time trying to help James get through the most hideous chesty cough which is apparantly known as 'bronchiolitis'. After two days of drinking virtually nothing the Dr sent us to Basinstoke Hospital to be looked at. At 5pm I couldn't get hold of Eddie so Godfather Richard stepped into the breach and belted off to Little Sods to collect Will while I headed off to Charlie's Day Unit (yet again). The upshot of it all isn't brilliantly helpful. Because it's a virus James just has to get through it, but the issue is around his fluid intake as he's hardly been taking any milk. They were on the verge of sticking a tube down his nose and force-feeding him but fortunately he decided that sounded much worse than taking voluntary action and managed to get down a whopping 70 mls and was allowed home. Now all we can do is wait, keep his room humid (wet towel in position on radiator) and stuff saline down his nose before each feed to help him breathe....

Took James and Will for a walk yesterday in the blistering cold, but it was a lovely sunny afternoon and we were wrapped up to the nines after much bellyaching from both at being stuffed into pram suit/fleece respectively. Will was wearing his much loved boots and the concept of getting them muddy was initially appealing...until they actually did, at which all hell broke loose annd Will decided he was inconsolable at the soiling of his favourite footwear. Typically he chose to melt down in the middle of a field of about 10 horses. I'd checked it out beforehand and decided they were far enough away for us to scoot across without causing too much disruption. Unfortunately by the time Will had kicked off the offending boots, I'd replaced them, he'd screamed blue murder at walking through anymore mud and been tucked under my arm, the horses decided to say hello and came thundering towards us at full gallop. I haven't run so fast since the infamous 'Dobbin' incide...

The house is still a total mess, but the end is in sight and we're hoping to have the dining room in operation ready for Christmas Day rather than the sitting room as there have been all sorts of altercations with the fitting of the new fireplace which I won't drone on about here. Eddie and I are at the very end of our endurance when it comes to mess and there is going to be a serious cull of clutter over the next week or so. We're terrible horders but there comes a time when you have to be ruthless. Will is very excited about Christmas although having terrible trouble actually trying to say it. It comes out something along the lines of 'Sithimuths'. He has no idea what either it, or presents, are, but is obviously desperate to find out. In the meantime his absolutely favourite thing at the moment is The Most Annoying Christmas Card Ever, sent by his Uncle Lowly. It's a Father Christmas who which plays Jingle Bells while his nose and buttons flash. We have to li...

They say that boys start later than girls, but William may be the exception. He's a very proprietorial little boy, everything's 'his'; 'my Rabbit', 'my bootsies' even 'my Raynes' (his James) and now we have 'my potty'. Eddie is very patient, much more so than me (although in my defence it's usually because I'm wiping something revolting off James most of the time) and will spend ages reading to Will while he sits on the potty until something happens. But it's definitely having an effect because now William voluntarily produces the potty for either he or Rabbit to sit on and even if they don't do anything it's definitely progress. He clearly doesn't like wearing his nappy, and although I wonder whether he doesn't primarily associate sitting on it with getting his favourite story ready to him (invariably The Gruffalo, which he loves), gradually the penny is beginning to drop. Wouldn't it be fantastic if cr...

You'd have thought I'd know how to spell it by now :(

It's back. Well, not that it ever went away - Will's elbows and knees still flare up from time to time - but I'm sorry to say that it looks as though James is going to have it too. The left side of his cheek has been getting steadily more sore, and although I've been trying to write it off as a milk rash, I can't live in denial anymore. It's definitely ezcema. I suppose the only comfort I can take this time round is that I have the benefit of hindsight and I know what to do. Let's just hope it doesn't spread as badly as Will's did. In the meantime I've stocked up on Aveeno and will keep slathering it on as long as I need to. Big Brother, meanwhile, is still totally bunged up. He woke last night absolutely baking hot with a temperature nearing 39C. After being swiftly removed from his bag, stripped down, sponged off and syringed with 5mls Calpol order was restored, thank heavens. Get me - Nurse Houghton!

The only way to spend a miserable, dark, windy, rain-soaked Sunday. Unfortunately poor Will has woken up with a hideous cold and is streaming with it. Have re-stocked our already overflowing medicine cabinet with yet more Karvol as well as Tixylix, which I'm assured is a miracle cure for chesty coughs. Here's hoping!

James and I hit the Big Smoke to say hello to his favourite girlfriend Izzy. A great time had by all and credit to the babies for superb co-ordination so that when one was screaming the other took a breather and vice versa. James surpassed himself by reaching his peak just we were about to tuck into lunch, while Izzy wangled her way out of the cot and into her bouncy chair so she could natter to Mummy and Louisa - much more fun!

William's favourite programme and the beginning of the end of each day for Mummy and Daddy. I can't believe I've even reliquished my obsession with Hollyoaks in favour of Iggle Piggle, Macca Pacca and Upsy Daisy. William LOVES it and now we have the monstrous 50 inch TV you'll find us glued to this programme every evening (Molly included) looking a bit like the Simpsons. totally zoned out and ready for collapse. Sadly, my inability to remember the words to Macca Pacca's ryhme have even driven me to buy the book. "Oh Dear..." as Will would say.

And amidst it all, I finally manage to capture a smile on camera :)

Don't be fooled.

We've called an amnesty in the battle against the Warts but unfortunately the Houghtons are currently on the losing side. Nothing we've tried so far has worked and now we have a horrible feeling that Will now has melloscom (sp!)on one of his legs. Why can't he have a break? First the egg, then peanut allergies, hives, ezcema, warts - I dread to think what's next? The worst thing is that we are totally unable to help in any way, it's just something his system needs to recognise is wrong and get rid of. Until it does I guess we're going to have to grin, bear it and hope to God James doesn't catch them....

Sometimes I forget how new Will is, in all the flurry around James' arrival you forget that William is still only a baby really himself. It's an amazing time because everything is new to him and I love teaching him about things and watching his face light up. Things you'd never think of like how to separate all the segments of a satsuma, breaking the ice on top of a puddle, frost, the sun and moon, pheasants!, climbing over a stile, how to hold a knife and fork. All these are completely new to Will and it's the best thing ever being the one to teach him all about the world the millions of adventures and experiences it holds that make life so much fun.

The Big Weigh-In yesterday and James has put on a whole pound and now weighs in at 9lbs 5ozs. I'm so, so relieved and happy! Typically the health visitor had to get in a dig about the fact he could have gained this much weight if I'd carried on feeding him myself. Very unnecessary and unhelpful - and wrong. I know I've done the right thing. Now we can relax a bit. In the meantime James is in his first pair of jeans after a trip to Reading this morning and has been so lovely for the last couple of hours just chilling out and cooing at me while I've been faffing about as usual. Off to Mothercare to get Will a snowman costume now ready for Christmas Carols at Little Sods. Next photo I post will be one of James smiling, but I'm b*ggered if I can catch one :)

Poor James, it was his first set of innoculations today - two injections consisting of a total of 6 different vaccines. Hideous. I am hopeless, you'd have thought after two ceasareans I'd be OK around needles but I can't watch, I just get all teary and clutched James for dear life trying to make it not hurt as much. He's a stoic little soul though and has done so well this afternoon, although I did pre-empt any possible fever with Calpol when we got home which I hope has helped. Not brilliantly settled again this evening but what's new? Roll on midnight and another freezing dash to the microwave to prepare his bottle. In the meantime I'm relaxing in bed with my beloved EB and waiting for Mol to come up and reclaim her rightful place at the end of the duvet. The downstairs is too hideous even for her now, no matter what Eddie says!

Absolutely knackered in every possible way after a very busy weekend spent coping with shrieking baby and whinging toddler. Saturday afternoon was spent at our annual NCT birthday party for the 'babies'. I think we're all in denial that not only are our little tiny babies now 2 (or nearly) but we now have second children on the scene. A great time had by all, and most of all a chance for a glass of wine and a natter with the girls. We came home just in time to meet Dave, Maddie and Greg who were over for supper. I would have probably enjoyed the evening more had I not spent most of it racing up and down the stairs trying to settle the aforementioned shrieking baby. What is it about children - they have a sixth sense when it comes to knowing their parents have friends over and want to relax, or worse actually Go Out. Heaven forbid. Peace was finally achieved at around 10pm by which time I was too tired to cope anymore and had to head up to bed. The days of chilling over a fe...

The boring thing about trying to get thin is that it takes forever to see results and it hurts. So far I've done one post-natal class, one Body Pump class and a bike ride. All were relatively painful and I still feel huge and haven't lost any weight whatsoever. Feeling impatient to get results and put my jeans on without straining...need to play the long game and not try to rush things.

Will was SO upset about the cape - he hated it. Even Daddy flying him round the room to explain what it was for couldn't mollify him. Fortunately we distracted him long enough by showing him how the camera worked and getting him to say 'cheese' to take this picture and then he went back to trying to wrestle it off again. (Clearly we didn't cave and the poor little sausage was forced to wear it for nursery regardless - cruel parents)....

After another restless night where James woke at 12.00am, 2am - 3am and then 5.30am I gave him another 5oz top-up at 6.30 and ended up with a chilled, peaceful, smiley baby all the way to 8.30am when Will was ready for his breakfast. In the light of a new day I'm feeling much more positive about things and if not getting enough food has been the problem for James all along at least now we know how to help him. Have been topping him up all day today and now he's fast asleep upstairs, settled and quiet. A revelation. Now let's see if he can stay that way for long enough for me to escape out for lunch...hmmm...we'll see. In the meantime Number 1 Son is following in Amber's footsteps and gone punk for Children in Need (I was b+ggered if I was going to forget 'silly hair day' after failing miserably to provide him with a costume for Halloween). We finally dropped him off at nursery after having to hose down what can only be described as one of the most revolting ...

I took James for a weigh-in today and he's only gained 1oz in a week. It's like history repeating itself all over again because it was around the same age that Will's weight flatlined. I am so upset, I really hoped that I could feed him properly for much longer but now I'm not so sure. You have so much pressure from Health Visitors and the NCT to have this natural birth and then breastfeed your child, but it's really hard going and if it doesn't work out you feel so guilty. When I got home I fed James for 20 minutes but then topped him up and he took 4ozs, which tells me pretty much all I need to know. I'm not going to make the same mistake as I did with William and persevere for myself rather than thinking about the child. This time we'll give it one more week topping him up and if there's a marked weight gain then my breastfeeding days are over. And I'm going to have a ritual burning of all my maternity bras!

Poor, exhausted, over-tired James absolutely refused to sleep yesterday and ended up in a complete stew, screaming incessantly and at full blast for hours on end, apparantly inconsolable. Fortunately he saved his worst until after Uncle Peter, Jackie and Amber had gone home and was actually on pretty good behaviour over lunch, giving everyone a chance to have a cuddle. Eddie had chosen the weekend to go out on the lash with Gary and had to get through the day with a shocking hangover after 8 pints and a couple of large glasses of red. James finally decided to give up at 8pm, leaving us with welsh rarebit for supper and then oblivion. Until Groundhog day began again... James is now in his own room after we finally reached breaking point a couple of days ago and both jumped out of bed at around 1am when the screaming was unendurable and ran James, still in his moses basket, into the nursery and shut the door. It's so hard to know what to do if the baby is fed, clean, changed an...

Poor Molly, she still cannot believe she has to put up with not one, but TWO new people in the house. Will's adoration is no consolation whatsoever.

I'm torn! James is now 8lbs 6ozs, so by no means a whopper at all (O the irony) but he's long and rapidly running out of room in the moses basket. Moving him into his own room looms, but he's still waking up 3 times a night to feed. So do I: a) Move him anyway, feed him in the nursing chair and get even more tired in the day but get him used to the new room (and give Eddie more rest) b) Maintain the status quo and put him straight into a cot with no time in between to get used to the nursery but get some sleep at night Decisions, decisions! I can't face sitting in the nursing chair getting cold and being awake in the middle of the night, but feel it's probably the right thing to do. Maybe I'll just give it a few more days before I finally make a call.... :)

Another weekend passes us by and Eddie continues on his fanatical mission to get as much of the house finished in time for Christmas. As a result, the St Martins School bonfire is largely made up of the sitting room floor and Will, James and I are surrounded by concrete and tool boxes.

Or Waitrose as it's known by the locals here in sunny Newbury - a haven for the weary Mummy. Somehow chasing a toddler down the fruit and veg aisle while your baby screams blue murder just as you get to the check-out, is made all the more bearable by the sheer, civilised beauty of food and surroundings. My shopping list this week looked something like this: 1 x large bottle of Ribena 2 x packs Lemsip Xtra Strength sachets 1 x bottle Russchian 1 x bottle Tonic Pampers no 2 1 x large packet fresh coffee 2 x Gu chocolate fondant tarts Heat magazine All I need to survive a week with the boys :) In the meantime a much needed coffee and natter came in the form of Granny Dee, who James and I went to visit yesterday. James was an angel and slept for the entire visit, with the exception of the times when he had to eat! Alas I paid a heavy price last night for all that sleeping, but it was worth it.

I had a lovely morning yesterday chatting to the girls at playgroup, feeding James and watching William tootle about. Will is such a careful little boy, not boisterous at all. He was trying to copy a little girl going down one of the slides on her front, but did it on his hands and knees in case he went too fast. Sometimes I get a lump in my throat just watching him - I want to scoop him up and run away with him! HOWEVER, peace comes at a price and the afternoon was hideous with both boys screaming pretty much non-stop. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Poor Will has a stinking cold so I ended up dosing him with Calpol while feeding James and finally got a moment's peace. Typically, by the time Eddie came home at 6.30pm calm was restored and he couldn't understand why I was in such a foul mood. As far as James' sleeping goes, we hit Waitrose and stocked up on Aptimil cartons to top him up before bed, and the dreaded dummy as a last resort. I'd actually m...

They fit at last (I think I bought them about a year ago)....!

If only he was this angelic at night! Off to go and scoop up the poor shrieking boy now, and try to settle him in front of Holby City before Eddie comes home (currently fighting his way down the M4 past a multiple pile-up - G.R.E.A.T).

Downstairs trying to eat dinner while James shrieks upstairs. What can we do? Nothing works. He won't settle no matter what we do. We're at our wits end. 4 minutes to go and we'll go to him. If I thought anything we could do would make a difference we'd do it - but seriously, NOTHING IS WORKING. Going to take another swig of my chardonnay and go back into the fray.

2006 Nothing much changes in a year does it? Eddie and I spent today trying to recover after a particularly hideous night with James which ended up with me pacing in front of 'Greystoke' (good film) at 2am. Nothing seems to work - he is changed, fed, winded, clean and tired but he won't settle if you hold him, rock him, put him in his chair or cot - nothing. So we're at the stage where we feel if he won't settle anywhere, he's just going to have to learn the hard way. Today was understandably all over the place and James slept for most of it which doesn't bode well for tonight. The plan is to let him cry for 10 minutes at a time before settling him, but it's horrible. The screams go through you like a hot knife through butter - I never knew 10 minutes could take so long :( But we'll see if maybe it'll help him realise that bedtime is bedtime. If not, we're out of ideas.... 2007

Well I had to put James somewhere while I sorted out the washing.

James isn't too bad actually, he usually feeds at around 1.00am and then 4.00am and by then I'm so tired I nod off too and wake up when he squeaks. But the early evening is still hellish. From 7.00pm until around 9.30pm he absolutely will not settle. He'll be bathed, fed, clean and exhausted, but the minute you put him in his moses basket all hell breaks loose. I don't have the answer - Will was equally appalling. Maybe it's because I've been feeding him downstairs rather than in the quiet of our bedroom? I think tonight we'll bring the moses basket down, so when he's finished a full feed, rather than walk him upstairs, we can just pop him in really quickly. Might work. Worth a try! Alas with two I can't lock myself away in a darkened room to feed as I used to with Will, so compromise has to be the way forward. We shall see.

What I wouldn't give to be this baby! Back at home after a bit of a stressful visit to work where I got hounded by security for most of the time. Not unexpected - they're rotweillers - but you'd have thought given my circumstances they'd have cut me a bit of slack. The main thing was seeing everyone and introducing James and I was so pleased we went in and said hi. When I was finally chased off the premises by yet another over-zealous security guard I sought sanctuary with Debs via Waitrose! James and I finally got round to doing the 'screaming-baby-at-the-checkout' thing (a rite of passage) and then a lovely natter over coffee and millionaire's shortbread with Debs, Taylor and Milla. Am now back at the ranch, manically trying to do my chores and eat lunch before His Nibs wakes up and really starts going for it...about 10 minutes to squeeze everything in then....I think I might have to put Heat on ice :(

A word on Molly, who is still in high dudgeon following the arrival of James. However, despite everything she still insists on coming with us on every walk, getting to the end of the village and then waiting patiently until we come back from our adventures. The other day Eddie, Will, James and I tootled off up Jaggers Track with Molly following nonchalantly behind. But we came back a different way... 3 hours later I wondered why she hadn't been in for her supper, when I suddenly realised where she was - I poked my head out of the front door and called for her. She'd been sitting at the start of the track where we'd left, waiting for us to come home. Now THAT'S loyalty.

I have! It's my bed - a brief respite from the chaos while the boys sleep. We had a lovely day yesterday apart from the final frontier - bathtime - during which James decided to shriek non-stop at full blast while William found out he could pull down his nappy, full of the most hideous, sticky, smelly, revolting poo he could possibly have produced, and proceed to step it into as much of the carpet and surrounding furniture as possible. It was at this point I totally lost it and bellowed for Eddie to STOP doing the DIY and come and help me! When we eventually wrestled both boys into bed it was just time for the results of Strictly Come Dancing and then as far as I was concerned I only had enough energy left to sink into the bath followed by bed. A life? I'm reliably informed this is one, but you wouldn't know it sometimes. Today has been OK, it's my first alone and apart from a few clashes first thing (at which point I headed out into the fog with both sons strappe...

Poor old Will, it's one thing after another for him and our current challenge is warts. His left hand is covered. So night after night we Bazouka him in the hope they'll go - so far his hand is a total mess, covered in white goo, but they do seem to be getting smaller, so we live in hope. In the meantime James is thriving, I can't believe he's a month old tomorrow. Am typing like a demon because I can hear escalating squeaks from above and know I'm on borrowed time. Last night the little sod (number 2) screamed throughout the entire rugby world cup. Was ready to lob him out of the window after 4 hours of it... :( On a less stressful note we had a visit from Sarah, Janie and Isabella on Friday. Great fun and much shepherds pie consumed and coffee drunk. A lovely day. James has got some serious growing to do to catch-up with his new girlfriend!

Why is it that whenever we need peace and quiet, chaos always seems to hit in the shape of yet more house renovation. We're now working our way through the downstairs, starting with the Snug then the Sitting Room, Hall and Dining Room. Jim and Eddie have already shimmied up the scaffolding to take some pictures of the village (we should charge) while an army of workers come and go, leaving the back door open and making endless cups of dusty tea. James and I are currently hiding in the sitting room (as yet untouched) as I manically type and wonder when he's finally going to have a nap this morning. This 'flying by the seat of our pants/no routine' lifestyle is a precarious one.